October 10 2014

Welcome to the Other Side of Darkness

My name is Beth, and I am here to tell you my story. A story of my journey into a life of darkness, hopelessness and despair; into the very pits of what I call hell, and the amazing force that brought me up out of the darkness, and into the light.

outofdarkness

I have always felt alone and sad. I never felt good enough or loved. As a teen I was raped by my boyfriend and became suicidal. Later I fell into drugs and alcohol, which consumed a large part of my life. In my search for truth and meaning in life, I delved deeply into the occult and witch craft and new age for several years. I was in several abusive relationships and continued to be depressed and lost for many years.

Does any of this resonate with you? Have you ever struggled with depression or suicidal thoughts? Or maybe your struggle was with addiction to drugs or alcohol. Have you been searching, wondering, why you are here? Is there a purpose in life? Have you suffered and been so tired that you just can’t take it anymore? Was there a time in your life you used witch craft or new age practices in your search for the truth?

I am here to tell you I understand completely. I have walked in those shoes as well. I have felt unbearable pain and sought to try any means possible to numb it or take it away. You are not alone. There is hope. There is help and healing for you. I have received unbelievable healing, comfort, joy and lasting hope in life! I have known unconditional love, that surpasses my understanding. And I have found peace in knowing why I am here on this earth, and what my purpose is. You are loved beyond anything you have ever known in your life! And you too can experience this wonderful joy and hope that I have found. It is there even for you!

Please explore my blog and learn more about my life, my experiences and how I found light in a dark world. Learn more about walking in joy and victory! I pray you will be blessed beyond measure as you read this blog. Thank you so much for visiting!

 New Posts Come Out Every Monday (with the exception of holidays)!

To read my testimony of how I went from being a witch who hated God, to a Christian please go to My Testimony.

To read more about my life, and how I lived a life of pain, hopelessness and walked from away from God, please go to My Story.

To read my new posts about recovered memories, where I am beginning to speak of my childhood abuse, please go to Recovering Childhood Memories. (If you are SRA please be advised these posts are full of triggers.)

To read about how I came to a Christian church and found a relationship with Jesus, please go to Into the Light.

To read more about my life and my latest posts (with the exception of new memories), please go to Living in the Light.

To visit my Youtube Channel where I post videos weekly about Christian life, spiritual gifts, warfare and much more, go to My Channel!

 

 

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December 5 2016

Breaking Ties To The Occult

 occult tiesWhen I first came into a realization that I was still connected to the occult, I was confounded to say the least. I had come into this amazing relationship with Christ and had renounced witchcraft, and all my involvement with the occult numerous times. Wasn’t that enough? For some it may well be enough, but for me I knew there was something more than what I was experiencing in this life, something so palpable and tangible that I was willing to keep working to pursue it. That something was personally knowing Christ.

I had come to a point where I had seen the face of God, and felt His love envelope me. That was enough to know that what I was experiencing as a Christian was but a taste of what I was created to have. These times of experiencing God like this were mere moments in my life; and those fleeting moments left an impression on me so deep that I would do whatever it took to have more of the Living God.

I was so oppressed at that point in time. I had brain fog, depression, explosive anger, physical pains and much more. All of this was getting in the way of my daily life, let alone coming closer to God. If this oppression was what was getting in the way of my relationship with Jesus, then it had to be healed and removed. The problem was I had already tried everything I could think of to fix it, and nothing helped.

As the deer pants for streams of water,

so my soul pants for you, my God.

My soul thirsts for God, for the living God.

When can I go and meet with God?

Psalm 42:1-2

As I mentioned before, I openly renounced all of my involvement with witchcraft and the occult many times. I got rid of all my books, tarot cards, crystals, enchanted items, books, and much more. I even got rid of anything that was about witchcraft, such as movies with witchcraft, or fiction books with witchcraft. I was serious about cutting that part of my life off completely. So why was I so oppressed? What had I done to deserve this torment and hell I was living in?

The question was not what had I done, but what had been done to me. The connections to the occult do not always come simply because you chose to participate openly in witchcraft of some sort. As a matter of fact, many people who are attracted to the occult will most likely find they already have hidden connections to the occult within them. That is the reason the attraction is there.

In my last post I talked about being how being indoctrinated into the occult can happen to anyone and they can be completely unaware. I described how blood ties are all that is needed in order to create a connection with the occult into a person. You need not ever openly pursue witchcraft or the occult in order to have been indoctrinated into it’s belief systems. The occult is a way of life, much like Christianity. It prescribes to certain beliefs, thought processes, and mind sets. These beliefs are constantly reinforced through many TV programs, movies, music, and much more.

What I came to learn over this past year is that my connections the occult and witchcraft ran so deep, that even I was unaware of them. Many of my ancestors had been involved in the occult through false religions and worship of false gods and goddesses. Through these false beliefs they were indoctrinated into, they were convinced to give over access to, and the blood rights of, every generation after them. That was all that was needed for the devil to be able to begin his plan over my life.

The coming of the lawless one is by the activity of Satan with all power and false signs and wonders, and with all wicked deception for those who are perishing, because they refused to love the truth and so be saved.

2 Thessalonians 2:9

Thankfully God had a plan far before Satan ever did. He had a plan over my life to bring hope and truth into this dark world. He chose me to be a light, shining brightly in the midst of this darkness, and bring many more torch bearers into awareness with me. At first I really couldn’t hear any of this truth. It was hard enough understanding that I was still in the occult. Let alone that I had been tortured into agreeing to allow many more connections to the occult inside of me.

Many people like myself will have experienced the same type of things, to varying degrees and levels, and have no memory of it either. I only was able to come into the truth of my life because I was willing to pursue Jesus with every ounce of my being. That meant going into the very darkness I had been trying so desperately to hide from. You see, because of the terrible events I was forced to participate in, I believed nothing by horrible things about myself. It was those beliefs; that I was evil, bad, that God hated me, that I was irredeemable; that kept me from every wanting to seek the truth. How could I go to God to find truth when it was the truth that was going to expose how evil I truly was?

Yet week after week I have been willing to walk into the pain, the hell, the terrible memories, and allow Jesus to bring light to all these dark places inside of me. I have been exposed to so much truth and hope and light that it has changed me in ways that are absolutely remarkable. I have gone from oppressed to encouraged; and it is all because of my surrender.

God has a plan for each one of our lives. A plan to bring us into His glory in this world. A plan to partner with us to do amazing things for His Kingdom. This plan was set in place for before the foundation of the world was even laid. Yet many of us have become lost and forsaken in a world that seems to constantly beat us down. God has not given up on you. He hasn’t even begun to show you the miracles He will work inside of you.

 

How can a person who suspects that have been indoctrinated into the occult find freedom? Finding freedom is a process. There is no clear and concise guide on how to do so, but there are definite tools to help a person who is seeking healing and freedom. Each person is going to come to this path in a different way, because each person is unique. Every person has different levels of oppression and also of denial that keep them from knowing more about the hidden truth within them. Yet there is nothing that is impossible with God.

The first step is just to begin to try to connect on a deeper level of intimacy with Christ. Knowing Him more will give us so much strength to continue on a journey that can seem hopeless or impossible. Yet for some, there oppression is so severe that connecting with God is so difficult that it may take great strides to make any progress. Fear not, God will reward you for all your work to connect further with Him.

Deliverance is also another very important step into freedom and healing. It is only one step however. Deliverance was never created to be the completion of the process, but instead, the beginning of it. Deliverance with a trained ministry who knows how to get to the roots of demonic oppression, curses and ancestral blood rights is going to do a great work within you. However, every Christian who has a deliverance needs to do continued work afterwards. This life is a learning process, and a gift not to be taken lightly.

I never recommend self deliverance. We do not have the tools or skill set that allows us to get to the roots of oppression, curses, and blood rights. A true deliverance minister will not only bring us into a new level of freedom, they will also help us to connect to the Holy Spirit in new and amazing ways. They will help us to see miracles happen within us. They will help us to hear the voice of the Living God for ourselves. They are facilitators who allow God to come in and run the show, while maintaining peace and stability.

But now thus says the Lord, he who created you, O Jacob, he who formed you, O Israel: “Fear not, for I have redeemed you; I have called you by name, you are mine. When you pass through the waters, I will be with you; and through the rivers, they shall not overwhelm you; when you walk through fire you shall not be burned, and the flame shall not consume you. For I am the Lord your God, the Holy One of Israel, your Savior. I give Egypt as your ransom, Cush and Seba in exchange for you. Because you are precious in my eyes, and honored, and I love you, I give men in return for you, peoples in exchange for your life. Fear not, for I am with you; I will bring your offspring from the east, and from the west I will gather you.

Isaiah 43:1-5

I recommend that every single Christian have a deliverance, and that they use a ministry that goes to the head demon in charge. For more information on such a ministry, please go to my FAQ page. Many Christians will highly benefit from some sort of inner healing. Inner healing is going to help with healing emotional and spiritual wounds that have been stored up throughout our lives. Every person has some degree of emotional and spiritual trauma within them that has not been addressed, and it will fester inside of us if not healed.

Every person that wants to seek deliverance and inner healing needs to be deeply in prayer over this matter. It is not something to be taken lightly. If a person is not prepared they can be easily led astray by a minister who is actual trained to lead you back into oppression. God will bring the right people into your life at the right time. It took me almost 2 years to find the deliverance ministry that helped me. Two years of fighting and suffering and begging God for help. I had to be ready.

Warfare is a normal part of the Christian walk. The devil is not going to sit idly by while we pursue freedom and the call God has for us here. He is going to do whatever he can to try to trip us up, stop us, or throw us completely off course. Remember, he has already been working against us from day 1. He is not going to stop now.

swordEach Christian needs to begin to learn how to put on the armor God has given them and use the Sword of the Spirit to fight against the devil and his schemes. We need to be able to grow in discernment so we can understand the attack of our enemy. Every good soldier needs to know what they are fighting against and why they are in the battle. Each of us are soldiers in the Mighty Army of God, and as we strengthen ourselves in the Lord, we will grow our discernment and our battle skills.

Therefore, since we are surrounded by so great a cloud of witnesses, let us also lay aside every weight, and sin which clings so closely, and let us run with endurance the race that is set before us, looking to Jesus, the founder and perfecter of our faith, who for the joy that was set before him endured the cross, despising the shame, and is seated at the right hand of the throne of God.

                                                                                                                  Hebrews 12:1-2

Having the occult hidden inside of us is not something to fear. The occult is just another device of the devil that he uses to render us useless against him. These devices are not something that are impossible to overcome, but on the contrary; we were created to overcome them. Think of it this way; you have been entrenched into darkness for a reason. That reason being that when you overcome it, you have the power and the strength to help others overcome it as well. The devil does not want you to overcome it, but when you do, you will be a powerful weapon of God against the darkness.

That is exactly what keeps me going. There are many days when it becomes so difficult I truly want to give up. I want to go back to a simple life of baking and taking care of my family and leave this blog far behind. God always is so kind and loving though, as He gently reminds me that even if I was to quit, the war would still continue. I was made for this, and so were you. Together, we can partner with Jesus Christ, to become an unstoppable force to spread the glory and goodness of God.

You don’t have to be ready, you just have to be willing. Trust in Jesus. Be with Him. Tell Him your fears. He already knows them all. Believe that He is going to redeem every bit of hell you have experienced in this world and absolutely turn it around for your good. He loves you. You were worth the highest price to Him. He paid it willingly, for you. No matter how bad you may think you are, how useless or worthless. To Jesus Christ, you were worth it all. And that is a fact that nothing can change.

The Spirit of the Lord is upon me, because he has anointed me to proclaim good news to the poor. He has sent me to proclaim liberty to the captives and recovering of sight to the blind, to set at liberty those who are oppressed, to proclaim the year of the Lord’s favor.”

Luke 4:18-19

November 28 2016

Have You Been Indoctrinated Into The Occult?

occult indoctrinationGrowing up I was not a happy child. I was always very lonely and sad. Yet as an adult I would never have looked back and told you there was something really terrible about my life. For me it seemed pretty average. I had a mom and a dad, as well as a sister. My parents both worked and I went to school every day. I always had a warm home and bed; nice clothes to wear and food on the table. I was never lacking in any of those basics needs. My parents fought a lot and were very angry all the time. We went camping during the summer, or to the lake to swim. I loved my family the best I could.

Looking back on my life I can start to put the pieces together. I can see things that I could not see as a child. I have an understanding of the world and how it works that I did not have as a child. As a child, many things were hidden from me, and it was not until I began looking that I began to have answers. I would never have told you I grew up in the occult and participated in satanic rituals as a child. Never. These was knowledge that was so well hidden from me that only God could reveal it to me.

When you look deeper into the meaning of the word occult, you will see that it goes much deeper than we even realize.

1. of or relating to magic, astrology, or any system claiming use or knowledge of secret or supernatural powers or agencies.

2. beyond the range of ordinary knowledge or understanding; mysterious.

3. secret; disclosed or communicated only to the initiated.

4. hidden from view

OR

1. to shut off from view or exposure :  cover, eclipse

So as you can see the occult can be something you are a part of and never even know, unless you have been given the right or power to know about it. That is how I lived my whole life in the occult and had no idea. Many people, like myself, have been indoctrinated into the occult with no knowledge of it whatsoever. They live their whole lives with hidden connections within them to the occult and this knowledge remains hidden from them. Many people would rather choose not to know. I can completely understand why.

There are many ways in which a person can be indoctrinated into the occult. You see, the devil will stop at nothing to rise up his own army that will come against Christ on the Last Day. He started generations ago and has planted a seed inside one that would carry into millions. That seed started with Adam and because of his choice, every blood line became tainted by sin.

How can a Christian be in the occult and not know? It starts with your blood line. Thousands of men have given over the right to their entire heritage and blood line through the occult. All general fraternities, such as Masons, Shriners or any other order, brotherhood, fellowship or group of knights or sons are all occult. Not to mention all lodges such as Elk and Moose and the Rotary Club. All these groups do satanic rituals and give allegiance to false gods and goddesses.

Behold, children are a heritage from the Lord, the fruit of the womb a reward. Like arrows in the hand of a warrior are the children of one’s youth. Blessed is the man who fills his quiver with them! He shall not be put to shame when he speaks with his enemies in the gate.

Psalm 127:3-5

Then there are the cults, such as Mormons, Jehovah’s Witnesses, Seventh Day Adventists, Scientologists and many others. These groups all worship false gods and goddess also, and do satanic rituals. Then there are religions that worship false gods and goddesses, such as Hinduism, Buddhism, Muslim, and many more. Yes, even Catholicism worships false gods and goddesses.

These are all groups that look good and positive on the outside. They are high functioning members of society that do good. Then we have groups that are openly a part of the occult, such as all groups of witches and pagans, as well as new age and satanists. This is such a small list of the number of groups that are a cover for the devils schemes. There are many others that I have not listed. This does not exclude Christians by any means. There are many Christians who are in a fraternal order such as Masons and have great influence over our churches today. These men have helped to bring the occult into the Christian church.

If you have had one family member in any of the groups I listed, you have a blood line in the occult. Each and every male member of these groups is indoctrinated in and has to give blood rights over to every generation after him in order to be accepted. Many of them have no idea of what they are really doing. Most men would never willingly cause these kind of harm to anyone else. The devil is extremely deceptive, and knows exactly how to draw people in, causing them to believe what they are doing is indeed good. Just like he did with Adam and Eve.

I am not saying that every single person in the occult has been a party to the same type of satanic ritual abuse I have been. However, there are many people out there, who, just as I was, were a part of this and had no memory whatsoever. It is only Jesus Christ Himself that reveals these things to us, when and if we are ready to know it. The fact is, that many more people who have no been physically a part of satanic rituals, have actually been a part of astral rituals.

But if any nation will bow its neck under the yoke of the king of Babylon and serve him, I will let that nation remain in its own land to till it and to live there, declares the Lord.

Jeremiah 27:11

We need to understand that the devil is using this as his fail safe. He wants to ensure that he will have as many turned against God as he possibly can. If we have parts of us that has allegiance with the occult, then it will be that much easier for him to use us in his own army. That is why it is so very important that we begin to remove the veils that have been placed before our eyes so we can allow God to bring us into alignment with who He created us to be.

Being connected to the occult sounds extremely scary. It sounds like you are evil or bad and that God is going to be very angry with you. It also sounds like you are powerless in helpless in an evil world. This is exactly what the devil would love you to believe, and exactly how he keeps it hidden from so many. We believe these hidden connections make us evil, and that we need to continue to keep them hidden, so we can live without fear or shame. Fear and shame are huge motivating factors for us. That is where grace comes in.

The fear of exposure and the shame of what we believe to be true about us is what keeps us in the dark. Staying in the dark is what is actually giving the devil the power within you. It’s not the connections to the occult itself that are dangerous, it’s the ignorance of them. Jesus has all power and authority over each one of these connections. So if you know about these connections, then Jesus can break them and set you free. If you see where you have hidden darkness within you, then you can expose it to the light of Truth; Jesus Christ.

Then you will know the truth, and the truth will set you free.”

John 8:32

In Hosea 4:6, God tells us that we are being destroyed because of a lack of knowledge. He is not referring to wordly knowledge that led us into sin., but the knowledge of the truth of who God is and the truth of who we are. God is a good and loving Father, and we are His people. He will never turn His back on us, but He welcomes us with open and loving arms. No matter what. When we believe that we are overcome by evil in an evil world, those beliefs are all based on lies about God. If we are evil, that makes God angry and harsh and condemning. If the world is evil, that makes God cruel and distant. It is those beliefs that fuel are fear and shame and keep us hidden in the dark.

During my childhood as I was abused, I was forced to worship false gods and goddesses and take on many, many spirits within my being. Everything that I did led me to believe I was evil and bad and terrible and that God could never love me or forgive me. That was the point of all the abuse; to turn me away from God and fill me with lies of who He is. All that made me powerless and helpless. It is the desire to find the truth in the midst of all this pain and find healing that has given me strength. Through my willingness to go into these dark places I have broken many connections with the occult and therefore made more room for a relationship with God.

I did not have to walk into this healing, and learn about my awful abuse, or the fact that I basically grew up in the occult. What a huge deception over my entire life. It was painful enough to feel as though my entire life was a lie, let alone to come to terms with the abuse itself. Many people that walk into healing of this depth actually quite before they get even as far as I have. It is a difficult process. Yet week after week I encounter God in ways that are so amazing and wonderful, I could never walk away. Exposing the darkness within myself has filled me with so much light and truth and love and peace, that it absolutely overshadows every thing else in this entire world. Nothing, and I mean nothing, compares to the love and knowledge of God I have now. And it just keeps growing.

This is the message we have heard from him and proclaim to you, that God is light, and in him is no darkness at all. If we say we have fellowship with him while we walk in darkness, we lie and do not practice the truth. But if we walk in the light, as he is in the light, we have fellowship with one another, and the blood of Jesus his Son cleanses us from all sin.

1 John 1:5-7

graceIf we refuse to see where we have connected with the occult, then we are taking away from areas in our lives where we can have more of God. Once you have had a taste of the Living God, it will be hard to not desire more and more of Him. Freedom from oppression will bring into the presence of the Living God and we will experience Him in ways we never though imaginable. The devil will do whatever he can to stand in the way of that. Including leading you to believe you have grown as much as you can, causing blocks or oppression to keep you from going further, and much more. So we must keep fighting and pressing in to Him, seeking Him with all that we have.

I hear from many oppressed people in my ministry. Many of them are desperate and seeking answers, lost and confused about why they have been suffering for so long. Add in the fact that you actually have spirits coming against you to try to stop you from gaining freedom, and life feels impossible. Diving into that depth of pain is so incredibly difficult, but it is doable. If I can do this, anyone can. I promise you this. That is, without Christ. Christ is the answer to every single problem.

No matter how far any one individual comes with their healing, God will love them and accept them. He does not care how far we go in healing, although He wants us to each find freedom. However, God knows exactly what each person can handle and where their heart is. God is in charge of each person’s healing, and we only need to partner with Him and do our parts. Jesus loves you so very much. He is not concerned with where you are at or what you have done. He is not worried about what you watch or eat or do. He is only concerned with your heart. Give Jesus your heart and trust Him, and watch and see the miracles He will do in your life. It is only a matter of time.

My prayer for each one of you is not that you come into complete healing and freedom in this life, but that you come into a complete knowledge and understanding of God as your Father, and Jesus Christ as your One and Only. If we can achieve that, then we have gained absolutely everything in this world. Jesus is the reason we are here. We were created to love and be loved. We were created to carry out an assignment in this world. It does not take strength or courage to complete your assigned job here on earth. It only takes trust. Trust in the One who created the heavens and the earth to pull you out of the pit and restore your life. He is faithful. He is love.

 There is no fear in love, but perfect love casts out fear. For fear has to do with punishment, and whoever fears has not been perfected in love.
1 John 4:18
October 10 2016

I Was Abused In A Satanic Halloween Ritual

satanic halloweenTwo years ago, as a brand new Christian, I came to the realization I had to let go of Halloween. As a non-Christian I absolutely loved Halloween. Obsessed really. I loved all things horror and gore, as a matter of fact. Zombies, witches, vampires, you name it. I was fascinated by all of it. We had quite the collection of Halloween decorations sitting in our garage that we had been working on for years. Costumes, skull lights, a severed head, tombstones, body parts, etc. All to make our yard look nice and festive for the Halloween season.

It was actually very easy for me to let go of Halloween that first year. I had come into this new relationship with Christ and experienced His love immeasurable. All I wanted was to give myself to God and receive more of Him in return. The love and the guidance of my beautiful Savior was something that I had longed for my entire life. And as I gave myself over to Christ, I found myself wanting to leave behind my old life of pain and death and despair.

Walking away from my old life meant leaving behind all of my associations with witchcraft and the occult. That meant my books on witchcraft, gods and goddesses, my Buddha statues, crystals, tarot cards, and much more. I knew that witchcraft was not something to trifle with, because it was dangerous. It was allowing darkness into my life and my home, and I was done with the darkness. Done. The darkness had done nothing good for me ever, but Jesus had given me life and hope.

For he has rescued us from the dominion of darkness and brought us into the kingdom of the Son he loves,  in whom we have redemption, the forgiveness of sins. Colossians 1:13-14

So that year we took that entire box of Halloween decorations and dumped it all in the trash where it belonged. I knew Halloween was a high holy day for witches and Satanists, because I had celebrated it many times as a witch myself. I had even done spells and rituals on this holy of holy nights. Halloween is when witches see the veil between the world at its thinnest, and they do rituals to contact the dead. They also use this time to celebrate death, because in the pagan culture, death is not the end of life, but the beginning of life in another world.

The next year on Halloween, I began to speak out about my testimony of how I broke free from witchcraft and that Halloween ia actually a pagan celebration. I was so passionate about sharing the truth with the world, because I didn’t want to see people getting sucked into the lies of the devil. So many people, Christians and non Christians alike, love Halloween. They get caught up in the season of Halloween, which is full of dressing up, parties, goodies, and other fun things. Little do they know that they are actually being a party to witchcraft in the process.

I remember last year speaking to a woman who was a satanic ritual abuse survivor and being so worried for her as she told me how difficult October is for her every year. I couldn’t quite understand why, but I knew that the increase of witchcraft activity must have a part to play in it. I learned more about the Satanic aspect of Halloween and the sacrificial murders that happen on this night. Yet it still seemed so far away from my own reality.

‘You shall not give any of your offspring to offer them to Molech, nor shall you profane the name of your God; I am the LORD.

Leviticus 18:21

It was just about that time last year that I began to have my own memories of being abused and tortured in satanic rituals as a child. I was barely coming to terms with it even being real for me as the memories slowly came in every week. It has taken me an entire year to process and understand and come to grips with some pretty intense truths about myself and this world we live in. One of those being that Halloween is far more than just a pagan holiday where witchcraft is prevalent.

It was only recently that God took me into a memory of being in a satanic ritual on Halloween. I cannot even say how many Halloweens I was forced to be involved in rituals on Halloween, as I am taking my time going through as the Holy Spirit wills. What the Holy Spirit has shown me was being taken into a satanic ritual at the tender age of 3. I don’t think any person can truly fathom the reality and the evil of a satanic ritual, and I do not intend to ever go into great detail about them, but I am going to explain enough so that you can have a better understanding.

Satanic rituals are not new to our world. They have been around for thousands of years, and they are talked about in the Bible, when people were sacrificing their children to the god Molech. Molech is the god of human sacrifice, and he is highly worshiped in satanic cults, along with many other gods and goddesses. Molech is a demon, not a god, and he is controlled by Satan himself. In ancient times satanic rituals were done out in the open where anyone could see. They were not hidden. But times have changed and the rituals have not stopped, they just had to be moved into places where it would not be detected.

And he burned his son as an offering and used fortune-telling and omens and dealt with mediums and with necromancers. He did much evil in the sight of the Lord, provoking him to anger.

2 Kings 21:6

All satanic rituals have one main purpose: to align people with the kingdom of darkness, so they can be filled with evil and be used to carry out the works of the devil. The devil has to do this, because what else does he have to gain power? No one would openly align themselves with the devil over darkness, when they know the Truth of the goodness of God. No, the devil always resorts to lies and deceptions in order to steal away God’s people, and he targets the most innocent first.

I remember quite clearly on this particular Halloween night getting dressed up and going to my Grandmother’s house with my parents. I was excited to show her my costume and go trick or treating. I had a Donnie Osmond doll with me. On my own I can recall nothing more. Yet here is what the Holy Spirit revealed to me. My parents told me before we went around the neighborhood we were going to go by the church (Mormon Church) for a fall festival there. The church was very close to my grandmother’s house, and I knew so from going often.

We went to the church and what happened next made my blood curdle. I was given candy, but that was just a preclude to the sexual abuse that would happen in a satanic ritual. On Halloween Satanists use young children, such as myself, as sexual idols to worship. Other children receive a far worse fate. Death. I know for some this is more than you can even think to believe, but it is true. I can barely write these words because the pain of the truth is almost more than I can bear. If it wasn’t for the grace and love of Jesus Christ, I would not even be here writing this at all.

And God raised us up with Christ and seated us with him in the heavenly realms in Christ Jesus, in order that in the coming ages he might show the incomparable riches of his grace,expressed in his kindness to us in Christ Jesus.

Ephesians 2:6-7

Why would anyone do such sick things to a child? There are a lot of reasons really. Most likely they are acting from what they know; their own sadistic abuse. Satanism doesn’t just all of a sudden show up. It gets implanted and takes roots and grows over time. It starts off small and infects everyone around it who isn’t grounded in Christ and able to see the truth of the evil around them. That is why Satan starts with children. If he can do this to small children, then they will grow up and do it to children themselves. That is what Satan’s plan was for me.

There are many churches that are going to have just the same type of rituals on Halloween night. Christian churches, Catholic churches, and more. Satan does not care what your religious beliefs are, he only cares that he can get a door in. Once he gets that door open, he is in for good, because the deception is just so deep. If we as a society cannot see that this happens, or refuse to believe it could be true, then no wonder Satan is in so deeply.

We have to be willing to open our eyes to the world around us. Satan has come to steal, kill and destroy, and he is doing it by masking it as peace, love and light. Yet the Bible makes it clear Satan will come in disguise as an angel of light. As long as we keep deciding to turn our backs to these sort of truths, we are going to continue to be held captive in this world. I am not alone in this abuse. Hundreds of thousands of others are just like me, and have been subjected to torment on Halloween night. And many more will also be tortured and murdered on Halloween as every year passes. The only difference between myself and most other victims is, I chose to allow God to bring me healing and remember it. I could not have done it without Jesus. It would be impossible.

He himself bore our sins in his body on the tree, that we might die to sin and live to righteousness. By his wounds you have been healed.

1 Peter 2:24

Halloween night is a night full of rituals, but also witchcraft. Witches and Satanists of all kinds get together in groups and perform rituals and also do spells and astral travel. This means that Halloween night is so full of witchcraft that it is basically impossible not to feel the effects of it. Most people do not understand what witchcraft feels like, so they have no idea. There is literally so much witchcraft going on that night that it is overtaking the world. That means that every single person that is participating in any type of Halloween activity on Halloween night is actually in agreement with all the rituals and witchcraft.

That means when we take our kids out to trick or treat, or to a fall festival or even to a costume party, we are coming into agreement with Halloween and what it is. We are not only teaching our children that Halloween is good and safe, but we are inadvertently allowing them to be aligned with darkness. In the laws of the spiritual realm, that is all it takes to make an agreement, or covenant. It is very important we stop looking at the world for just the physical nature of it, and start realizing that there is a spiritual side that encompasses every aspect of everything. Do we want to come into agreement with ritual abuse of children or witchcraft? I know, I do not.

Halloween is still a very difficult time for me, as I am faced with constant reminders about my abuse as I drive through the neighborhood or go to any stores. They are all filled with Halloween decorations, especially decorations of skulls, witches and other such things, that are directly related to satanic abuse for me. I used to love Halloween because so much of me was aligned with darkness. Now I am finding incredible levels of freedom, and Halloween can never hold anything fun or good to me ever again.

See to it that no one takes you captive by philosophy and empty deceit, according to human tradition, according to the elemental spirits of the world, and not according to Christ.

Colossians 2:8

worshipJesus has been absolutely central in my finding freedom, redemption and healing from my pain and my own personal hell. He has shown me a love like I have never known before in my entire life. He has shown me that His love is something that is pure and untainted, and that I am indeed special and valuable to God. Even more so, that I am wanted and precious in God’s eyes. How amazing is that. Once I had a taste of that love, I had to have more. That is what has led me to healing. Wanting more of Jesus Christ and His all-consuming love.

There may be evil in this world, but nothing is bigger than the power of the Almighty. The devil may have infiltrated churches, or taken over an entire night to align people unwittingly with darkness, but that can never change the truth of who God is. He is the King, and in the end He will wear the Victor’s Crown. The devil can try as he might to corrupt God’s people, but behind the scenes God is working relentlessly to save us all. If it hadn’t been for Jesus, I would have been completely corrupted, and on my way to hell. Jesus protected my spirit, which is eternal, so it could be with Him forever.

As hard as knowing all this abuse has happened to me, and even reliving it through flashbacks, I am thankful for it all. If it hadn’t been for this abuse, I could not be here right now telling about it. Which means so many others who have endured this life of hell and had no idea why, would never see the hope that lies in their own freedom. It also means that so many people who have been held captive to the lies of the devil would never be awakened to the truth. And it also means that there is a hope that children can start to be saved from this horrible abuse that is happening to them, and lives can be saved. All of this is because of the hope and the love of Jesus Christ. I am so very thankful for that.

Take no part in the unfruitful works of darkness, but instead expose them.

Ephesians 5:11

I pray for each person reading this that you are absolutely burdened with the truth, but absolutely freed with complete hope in restoration. We have to start now to work together, to love each other and build each other up in order to spread God’s message of love. The devil wants to spread fear and hate, but we need to remember it was love that saved us. God’s love did not stop on the cross. God’s love is so powerful that it will redeem more hearts and minds than the devil can ever hope to corrupt. He is good, and the devil cannot stop that goodness from spreading like a wildfire throughout this world, not matter how bad things look. We just have to learn who to focus on. Jesus. He is the giver of life and hope and truth. We need to turn our eyes to Him and see where He is asking us to go, and then surrender ourselves just enough so we can begin to follow Him. No matter how hard it is.

Jesus is safe. He is trustworthy. He is patient and steadfast in abounding love. If He weren’t then I would be dead. Yet I am alive! I am alive in Christ and hopeful in salvation to the utmost ends of this earth. God is willing that none should perish, not even one. He is working my loves! He is working for you, and everyone you know, to bring them into the rightness of a relationship with the Father. He is working at drawing you near and offering you hope from your affliction. It is only through Jesus that we as people can begin to make drastic changes in this world and tear down every stronghold the devil has made. And it all starts with love.

Love yourself enough to allow God to speak into your heart right now, no matter how hard it seems, and let Him bring you the truth. He will never bring you to a place that is more than you can bear, and He will never violate you, ever. He is good. Open up to Him now, and hear His truth. Receive His love. Bask in His goodness. He is worthy it. All of it. I love you all. <3

For I desire loyalty and not sacrifice, the knowledge of God rather than burnt offerings.

Hosea 6:6

September 19 2016

Satanic Ritual Abuse In The Church

ritual abuse churchWhat is satanic ritual abuse? Satanic ritual abuse is when an innocent victim is forced to take part in a satanic ritual. These victims can be any age, race or gender. Usually during the satanic  rituals the victim goes under some sort of physical, emotional or sexual trauma. There are many in this world who would believe that this sort of thing never happens. Then there are others who would believe this only happens in “satanic churches” or other such evil places. All would most definitely assume that it would never happen right in their own neighborhood, by people they know, who are Christian. That is how the devil deceives the masses daily.

A couple of years ago I would have been with the majority in thinking that satanic rituals were not something that happens, and most certainly doesn’t happen to “normal” people or “good upstanding” people. I was in huge denial. Denial can be a very good thing. When our core beliefs are not aligned with the Truths of God, it is hard to know the reality of the world or our lives. So while I loved God and followed Him, there were still hidden parts of me that believed that taking part in satanic rituals made a person evil and the world evil and unsafe. So denial kept me safe until Jesus was able to bring the Truth into my heart. I am not evil, and the world is not evil. That was really hard for me to hear.

After being abused for so long I really believe that church was evil, the world was unsafe, people are evil, God is evil, and that I was evil and tainted beyond hope. I walked around in my daily life with these as core beliefs. So even though consciously I wasn’t really registering these as my truth, when I dug deep and asked myself hard questions, I came to realize that really was how I saw things. So step by step, I had to start to see that Jesus was here to bring me healing from my past and freedom from the occult, and show me that none of my past made me or the world evil.

and you will know the truth, and the truth will set you free.”

John 8:32

I know that the devil has really worked hard to portray satanism as evil. So evil in fact, that it needs to just be tucked away and out of sight so we do not have to see it or deal with it. Now, I am not saying that satanism is not evil. What I am saying is that there are many, many people out there who are involved in satanism who are absolutely not evil. Yet because of the choices they are making, we will always see them as the thing they do, and not as the people they are. Satan has worked very hard to get us to identify with our actions, so that the work Jesus did on the cross would become null and void.

Evil is evil, and you cannot change that, but God is so much bigger than evil that in His presence, evil becomes as small as a knat. It is ineffectual and powerless in the face of God Almighty. So Satan has to try very hard to make us believe that evil is indeed much more powerful than it appears, and even more powerful than God. This way we will fear evil and turn away from it. The problem with this is, we have turned our faces away from evil to the point where we have absolutely no discernment for it whatsoever. The Bible tells us to turn away from evil and do good, but it never once says to pretend it doesn’t exist. It says to have discernment for the work of the devil in our lives so we can protect ourselves instead.

Yet we have come to this point in our world where we have such little discernment for the spiritual nature of every single thing, that we are completely blind to the very evil in our own homes, let alone our churches. That is how satanic ritual abuse continues to exist to this very day, and will not stop. Innocent victims are being tortured daily in our world due to the fact that we refuse to believe it can be real. It is generational. One person comes into this abuse, and it spreads into every generation after them. It is like a curse and a disease. Yet there is a cure. There is always a cure.

But solid food is for the mature, for those who have their powers of discernment trained by constant practice to distinguish good from evil.

Hebrews 5:14

The fact of the matter is, satanism happens wherever it is allowed. That means, it can happen in church, just like it did to me. Now I know some will say Mormonism is a cult (I agree) and that it’s not Christian, therefore it’s not a real church. According to dictionary.com, the definition of church is:

1. a building for public Christian worship.

2. public worship of God or a religious service in such a building

 the whole body of Christian believers;Christendom.

4.  any division of this body professing the same creed and acknowledging the same ecclesiastical authority; Christian denomination:

Therefore, any building where a group of people who come to worship their god and all have same beliefs, are a church. Which means Mormons, Jehovah’s Witnesses, Seventh Day Adventist and many other religions that people look at as a cult, are meeting in a church. And to the people that attend, it is a church.  A sacred place where they worship. That is all that it takes to make a church. And if it can happen in a Mormon church, it can happen in a Christian church, a Catholic church, or any other place where Satan has been given entrance and power through human rights.

How in the world can a Christian have anything to do with Satan? Isn’t that impossible? If you have followed any of my other blog posts or Youtube videos, then you know that it is very possible for even Christians to have a connection with darkness and the occult. Being a Christian does not mean you have broken evil out of your life, it means you accepted God’s free gift of salvation for eternity. Everything else is a work in progress for everyone.

Let’s use me as an example. So I was initiated into the occult basically at birth. I was taught how to do witchcraft, astral travel, worship false gods and accepted demons into my being. Yet because of the intense trauma I sustained I was unable to remember any of the actual events. Yet I still was in the occult, whether I knew it or not. My soul had taken part and accepted these things, and they were still a part of me. Years later I come to understand that Jesus loves me and wants to help me, so I accept Him as my Savior. That does not change or take away my past.

For I am sure that neither death nor life, nor angels nor rulers, nor things present nor things to come, nor powers, nor height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God in Christ Jesus our Lord.

Romans 8:38-39

Which leads me back to the world view I had: everything is evil. With that so deeply rooted within me, I took a lot of time and work to even come to a place where I was able to hear that I even believed these things. These beliefs kept me impotent to finding out the truth about my past. So although I was living a Christian life, I was still connected to darkness and unable to come to terms with that as a fact. It is only through submitting every part of you to God, even the dark parts we want to belief don’t exist, that we can get freedom from the darkness.

If I were to never have started inner healing and the truth, I could easily have found a way to have power in a church and brought satanism into that church. Satanism was still inside of me, and all I would have needed was 2 or 3 more who had the same type of agreements with the devil to work with me to start this at a church. Satan would have loved that! This is just an example, as it would take time and establishment and power within a church to actually start satanism within it, and I didn’t really have that on my side.

Most churches that are a party to satanism are already well established and have leaders who have great power and influence within them. These church leaders most likely have themselves been raised in satanic ritual abuse, and like me have no recollection of it whatsoever. They can do satanic rituals in church and not even realize they have done it. They gather together others within the church who have also been also raised with satanic ritual abuse and together they basically have a church within a church. Outsiders never even know it exists.

To understand this, you need to understand more about what happens to a person when they are traumatized to this severity. Extreme trauma causes dissociation. Dissociation basically means disconnecting from yourself, which is what a human has to do in traumatic circumstances to survive and not lose their mind. It is a coping mechanism that God has gifted us with so that we can continue to function and live through things that the devil has created to steal, kill, and destroy us. Here is a good article with more information on dissociation, but as it does not come from a perspective of God and how He views us and the world, please be advised to take any questions or thoughts on it directly to the Father. It is very important you do so.

No temptation has overtaken you that is not common to man. God is faithful, and he will not let you be tempted beyond your ability, but with the temptation he will also provide the way of escape, that you may be able to endure it.

1 Corinthians 10:13

The object of much of the trauma is to create this dissociation within a person so that they have what are called alters. Basically what that means is that the brain splits to create different parts within the same person to create ways to handle the trauma. These alters or parts carry the memories and pain of the trauma, so that the conscious self does not have to. Again, this is a gift from God and has saved many people from death or insanity. Having these alters is actually quite common, as many people have experienced great trauma in their lives. Many would think a person like this would like like someone with split personalities, but they often do not. They usually look completely normal, and you would never have any idea.

That is how a Christian can also be a satanist. They have already been inducted into the occult through satanic ritual abuse as a child, and they have alters who carry the knowledge of the rituals. The alter comes forward and takes over to do rituals, and then goes dormant again while your conscious self takes over. The dissociation keeps you from consciously remembering that you just did a satanic ritual, just like it did to me as a child. People have to dissociate during these rituals, because no person will ever willing decide to partake in evil like that. Not unless it was already done to them for so long it forces them to become evil themselves.

I know that this may sound very scary for some people. It may sound like something that is too terrible to deal with. I completely understand that. The point I want to bring, is that God is so much bigger than whatever Satan has done. The power of God is so much stronger than whatever schemes the devil has put in place. God is the Redeemer and Healer. He has been healing my life, so I can start to speak the truth into this world so that others like me can find freedom too.

grFear is our enemy. We were not made with a spirit of fear, but with power, love and a sound mind. The devil wants to destroy that within each one of us by holding us captive to fear. If we keep living in fear of the devil or the unknown, we will never be able to move forward into healing and freedom. We cannot keep walking in this world and take everything at face value. We are spirits and everything in this world is based in the spiritual first, because God is spirit. It is because God is spirit that He is able to be everywhere all the time. That means that no matter what you have done or where you have been in life, God has always been there. Just like He was there for me during my ritual abuse.

There is no fear in love, but perfect love casts out fear. For fear has to do with punishment, and whoever fears has not been perfected in love.

1 John 4:18

There were many times when I was so angry at God for allowing these things to happen. Yet He was there with me, protecting my spirit from harm during these events. If He had not protected my spirit, I would have been corrupted and be going to hell instead of heaven. That is what the devil intended for me. But God did not allow that to happen. And in the big scope of this life, my days on this earth are only a blip on the radar. I will spend the rest of eternity rejoicing with Jesus!! I will never remember any of this pain or anguish here.

It is only because I have been willing to see my past and how it connected me with darkness that I am able to sit here and write this. And because I write this, God is going to move and bring healing and freedom into the lives of others who were caught in a life of misery and suffering just as I was, but had no idea why. There is always hope, there is always a cure. That cure is Jesus Christ. He loves us so much that He will never look down on us for anything we have ever done. No matter how bad. If He did, Saul would have never become the Apostle Paul, but would have stayed just a murderer.

If God can bring hope and healing into my life, He can do it for anyone and everyone. All it takes is a step of faith and trust. Those are some of the cornerstones of Christianity. We cannot always see things clearly, but if we trust that in giving all of ourselves to God He can help us, then we can take the journey that He created us for. A journey into finding out who we are in Christ, and who He made us to be.

Dearly beloveds, I know that you are struggling and feel hopeless and afraid. Take the hand of the Father and let Him love you. Let Him show you how He sees you. You are not evil, you are not alone, you are not lost. God has got you! He has never let you go, not for one minute. Stop letting the devil deceive you into believing his lies and let God bring healing and hope into your heart, right now. Believe in Him. He is good.

Oh, how abundant is your goodness, which you have stored up for those who fear you and worked for those who take refuge in you, in the sight of the children of mankind!

Psalm 31:9